It has been a very hard week. I said that the weather changes moods and this week it didn't help the fact that, after the snow, the rain started to fall over the city. It's december for god's sake...give us some snow. It is switzerland after all.
Work has been difficult. I've been in court to fight a client who didn't want to pay my work. It ended with a compromise. I got enough but not the right amount. I am not getting along with my associate. And that is a pain in the ass. I play clean he doesn't. And, after all these troubles I got my taxation and the state forbidded me to costruct a huge project with a motivation that makes me really wonder "what the heck am I doing here"..."we just do not like it". I respect every single law, every single code and they tell me they just do not like it. And this is just the last motivation. The worst part is that they have been not allowing me to construct this project since 2004...I have been dealing with lawyers, judges, commitee of genius and so-called experts. Now I've had enough. I started thinking about my old field of interest whne I was in college. Scenario Planning. Strategic methods that help you to make flexible long-term plans. It all starts with a question: "what if....?" let's say... what if I do this instead of that? What if chose this instead of that? Anything you decide to do it makes you draw possible future scenarios. Including the best and the worst. A good thing is to look at the worst case. Whatever happens you know you'll be prepared. We used it and some times it helped. I am just wonderining why I didn't even think to use it in my personal sphere! "What if I chose this associate instead of this other one?", "what if I chose to stay in the US instead of coming back here?" "what if.....?????". I had to do it before, now is pointless. When things do not come out the way you expected them to be it is useless to go back and say what if.
I am very discouraged right now. Many thoughts are flipping through my brain. "what if I chose a different job?" is one of them. But this is the only thing I know for sure. I know the choice I made was the right one. What I didn't calculate is that the world around us is not the one I believed it would be. I need a positive thing to happen to me now. I hope my trip to Paris will inject some energetic creativity in my everyday. Waiting to see the outcome I am wandering through wonders and through many "what if".
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